Shame About Eating Healthy While Overweight

When we have extra weight or compulsively eat, there can be a lot of shame when we share with other people that we want to eat healthy, or commit to eating vegan.

We may feel like people are looking at us thinking, "Clearly, the healthy eating isn't working -- just look at you."

We feel they'll look down on us, ridicule us or feel our desires are invalid.

I can personally relate to this. When I went vegan and started wanting to eat healthfully, I was still a binge eater and I was overweight. And after I went vegan, I was still a binge eater and I was still overweight for a time.

When people would find out I had an interest in healthy eating, sometimes I would get underhanded comments like, "Oh wow, I always thought vegans were really skinny."

Or I could see them looking me up and down and immediately dismissing whatever I was saying about nutrition, because of how I looked.

For many of my clients, this shame causes them to compromise their eating when they are with friends and family.

We want to avoid how we feel about these projections from other people. And if we're wishy-washy or downplay our interest in eating healthfully, then we hope we might not get these projections.

Some people feel they can't publicly voice their interest in healthy eating or eating vegan until they lose weight.

We feel that only once we lose weight and are a "good example" of nutrition, then it will be valid to share our interest and it will be ok to stick to our guns.

Instead, I always urge people to commit anyway, and then just let themselves go through the emotions about these projections from others.

You may feel angry that people are treating you this way, you may feel the hot rush of shame, you may feel nauseating fear, you may need to have some good cries about how bad it all feels.

But no matter what you look like, and even if you still compulsively eat, you are allowed to have your aspirations with nutrition. You're allowed to be public with it, and you do not deserve judgment.

Let yourself feel how you feel about the projections that may come from others: your anger, fear, shame, or hurt about it.

Photo by Alexandra Andersson via Unsplash