A Story About a Dad Who Overate

I had a client once who was a business owner and single father of two.

He had some health issues including pre-diabetes, and his weight was higher than he liked. He ate convenience food and fast food, almost exclusively. He didn't have time to properly exercise, though his job kept him on his feet.

I started working with him to help him come up with a diet that would help him feel better, get healthier and lose weight.

As it turned out, his fast food lifestyle wasn't due to a lack of interest in cooking: he absolutely loved to cook, and he was in fact a very skilled cook. And he loved the flavors of well-made healthy food.

It also turned out his lack of exercise wasn't due to his not enjoying exercise: he loved hiking and lit up every time he recapped any hike he took, showing off his many pictures of the scenery.

As I got to know him, I realized that he had two main issues blocking him from health:

One was the issue of emotional eating and drinking.

Like many of us, he would at times use sweets or wine to quell his anxiety, his anger, his loneliness, or some other feeling.

I would go over to teach him and his kids to cook, and it was clear it was a rare moment in his life when he was ever doing one thing. However, he couldn't stand silence, so he wanted to play loud music.

The second issue was that he was so busy -- one of the busiest people I've ever met -- that he almost never had time to grocery shop, prepare food, or exercise. In fact, he barely had time to even sleep.

I came to see that he was also a workaholic and addicted to being busy, and that there were a few reasons for this:

1) The busyness itself achieved the same thing as heavy and excessive food does for many of us: it helped him avoid his feelings.

2) He gained worth about himself as a person from saying yes to people all the time -- usually very demanding people who were the take-advantage type. They made him feel like he was a good guy, and so he was endlessly overextending himself for others no matter the detriment to himself.

2) He wanted a certain luxurious lifestyle that was not in fact necessary, but something he desired.

His pre-diabetes and extra weight were a result of him rarely making time for health and nutrition. His rarely making time was a result of his workaholism and busyness. His workaholism and busyness were a result of issues with over-giving, suppressing emotions, and a desire for luxury. These issues were the result of unresolved beliefs and emotions, likely stemming from his childhood.

The underlying emotional causes of our inconsistent health and nutrition habits are not always so simple on the surface.

However, even though they can take some analyzing to figure out, we must always remember that radical change is possible if we address things from their root cause!

Photo by Louis Hansel via Unsplash